Power of Sexual Healing by Kim Keller
The Power of Sexual Healing
by Kim Keller
WhyAreWeWhispering.com
When I attended my first Tantra workshop 2 years ago, I had no idea what I was getting myself into.
A friend recommended the workshop based on my sharing of personal suffering around the attachments I had built in my life -- attachments to people, to my ideals, to the ways I thought things "should" be, and to my very limited ideas of what it meant to be sexual, sensual and open. It was suggested that Tantra would assist me in learning to be present for whatever showed up in my life. That seemed a good idea at the time.
I entered the Tantra workshop room without predisposed expectations. I hadn't read the book everyone in the room was talking about. I hadn't met or seen the facilitators yet (in fact, when they walked in, I thought they were workshop participants), I had experienced very few intimate partnerships in my life. And I wasn't long out of my 23-year marriage that had ended with an amicable divorce but lots of pain.
I now found myself in a room full of people looking to "explore, connect, heal, understand, enhance, expand, deepen, emote, challenge, and increase their intimacy and eroticism." I’ve listened to Marvin Gaye singing the praises of Sexual Healing for decades, but I had no idea what he meant. What was I doing with these strangers who were speaking of their "hopes in finding God through greater sexual techniques"?
I've learned that we are complex beings.
I have spent the bulk of my professional career in the study and practice of the psychological intricacies of human nature and the subsequent attitudes, behaviors and ideas that we manifest in our lives. What I have found is that they leave us with a variety of dysfunctions, unresolved issues, pain and confusion. We wonder why we respond a certain way, why we work to change our thought processes, and why we struggle with understanding the "hows" and "whys" of our lives and characters. I believe the use of various therapies and psychologies are often an important piece to our overall wellbeing and our ability to live our lives as productively and lovingly as possible.
I have also come to learn that there is only so much that traditional therapies can uncover. For some, there is another way of continuing our healing while finding wholeness and personal satisfaction in our lives, our loves, our relationships and ourselves. This is where sexual healing comes in.
Along with all these mental approaches, I have come to understand that we are energetic beings. We each carry a core of energetics in our body. It is important to become familiar with how these energies run through our being, and learn how they can become blocked or severed from one another. When these energies are in alignment and connected to one another, there is a feeling of harmony.
When our energies are not cohesive, there is dissonance. We become confused about what we are feeling or experiencing, causing us to grasp at ideas and philosophies in hopes of explaining the ensuing pain and chaos. We then continue with our old patterns of coping and struggle, hoping something will change.
Sexual healing is not just about sex; it is about bringing these energies together in a way that allows them to work in harmony and wholeness. It is a process that includes, but is not limited to, accessing your sexual center and sexual energy.
As a woman in the 21st century living in Western culture, I had learned to keep my sexual energy neatly tucked away in its own separate compartment of my life. Mostly what happened "down there" was yucky and messy and smelly. I knew there was some hidden pleasure spot, but even that was only occasionally accessed. I had thought of myself as sexually exploratory and open, as long as it was within the "appropriate" setting - mostly marriage or monogamous relationship. To think of exploring this part of my body with sacred touch and ceremony, with loving presence, acceptance, celebration, honor and love was a brand new concept for me.
I certainly would never have thought that accessing these sexual energies could somehow ~
Help me in my parenting
Help me in my work
Expand my creativity
Assist me in my relationships and
Enhance my overall well-being
It was all new to me, and I was petrified.
During my very first Tantric session, as I gazed deeply into the eyes of the man I was partnered with, I felt a flood of emotions that I had not previously known I was holding. As the tears flowed I felt the release of disappointments and pain that I had unknowingly been holding for years. As he held me, I physically experienced a feeling of release in my heart, as if a rubber band that had been constricting my heart's flow had been removed. His training had prepared him to expect anything. He had been told that a woman in her process could be ecstatic, angry, distraught, frustrated or any other of the hundreds of emotions we carry. His challenge was to stay present with whatever showed up, and to be willing to hold those feelings, and me, regardless. He did that beautifully as I cried, went numb, laughed and cried some more.
Over time I have gained an entirely new understanding of the masculine and how much healing there is when it comes together with the feminine with the intention of healing and wholeness. As our session came to a close we both laughed and cried together. I continue to be in awe of the power of presence, intention and healing touch that we can gift to one another. His sense of presence was certainly a gift to me.
After two years of practice, continued training, and eventually becoming a certified Tantric educator, I now know I had only been partially present in my own life. An invaluable part of me had been closed down in such a way that it was difficult to access the higher levels of joy, bliss, insight, intuition and connection. I now realize I had spent a lifetime in shielded protection from being loved too deeply, being seen too fully, opening too widely and being held too closely.
The effect of this work has been far-reaching.
For months following the workshop I noticed how different my world looked and felt. Food tasted different, the wind on my face felt different, my interactions with people on the street were different, and certainly the quality of my close relationships became deeper, stronger and more profound than anything I had ever experienced.
And now, as I work with clients from around the world, I am able to witness the power of sexual healing for others as well. Tantra practice has opened me to new ways of accessing my heart, my feelings and my very being. Yet along with increased highs came increased lows. My range of emotion continues to grow exponentially and my ability to hold them all is increasing as well. I am learning that it is not without contraction that we find expansion, and the work of sexual healing certainly causes both.
Kim Keller has spent the bulk of her career the past 20 years as a personal coach, counselor, trainer, facilitator, speaker and program designer for Human Development projects across the US. Her wide range of experience in the field of personal growth, as well as her own life experience as a parent, wife, professional, business owner, humanitarian and now grandmother gives Kim a wide perspective on the many different hats women are asked to wear during this time of shifting in our consciousness, in our world, in our relationships and in ourselves.
Kim brings a vast range of expertise to her work, as well as her personal passion for assisting in the birthing of a new way to be in the world. TheYinProject.com & the Divine Feminine Institute
WhyAreWeWhispering.com
When I attended my first Tantra workshop 2 years ago, I had no idea what I was getting myself into.
I entered the Tantra workshop room without predisposed expectations. I hadn't read the book everyone in the room was talking about. I hadn't met or seen the facilitators yet (in fact, when they walked in, I thought they were workshop participants), I had experienced very few intimate partnerships in my life. And I wasn't long out of my 23-year marriage that had ended with an amicable divorce but lots of pain.
I now found myself in a room full of people looking to "explore, connect, heal, understand, enhance, expand, deepen, emote, challenge, and increase their intimacy and eroticism." I’ve listened to Marvin Gaye singing the praises of Sexual Healing for decades, but I had no idea what he meant. What was I doing with these strangers who were speaking of their "hopes in finding God through greater sexual techniques"?
I've learned that we are complex beings.
I have also come to learn that there is only so much that traditional therapies can uncover. For some, there is another way of continuing our healing while finding wholeness and personal satisfaction in our lives, our loves, our relationships and ourselves. This is where sexual healing comes in.
Along with all these mental approaches, I have come to understand that we are energetic beings. We each carry a core of energetics in our body. It is important to become familiar with how these energies run through our being, and learn how they can become blocked or severed from one another. When these energies are in alignment and connected to one another, there is a feeling of harmony.
When our energies are not cohesive, there is dissonance. We become confused about what we are feeling or experiencing, causing us to grasp at ideas and philosophies in hopes of explaining the ensuing pain and chaos. We then continue with our old patterns of coping and struggle, hoping something will change.
Sexual healing is not just about sex; it is about bringing these energies together in a way that allows them to work in harmony and wholeness. It is a process that includes, but is not limited to, accessing your sexual center and sexual energy.
As a woman in the 21st century living in Western culture, I had learned to keep my sexual energy neatly tucked away in its own separate compartment of my life. Mostly what happened "down there" was yucky and messy and smelly. I knew there was some hidden pleasure spot, but even that was only occasionally accessed. I had thought of myself as sexually exploratory and open, as long as it was within the "appropriate" setting - mostly marriage or monogamous relationship. To think of exploring this part of my body with sacred touch and ceremony, with loving presence, acceptance, celebration, honor and love was a brand new concept for me.
Help me in my parenting
Help me in my work
Expand my creativity
Assist me in my relationships and
Enhance my overall well-being
It was all new to me, and I was petrified.
During my very first Tantric session, as I gazed deeply into the eyes of the man I was partnered with, I felt a flood of emotions that I had not previously known I was holding. As the tears flowed I felt the release of disappointments and pain that I had unknowingly been holding for years. As he held me, I physically experienced a feeling of release in my heart, as if a rubber band that had been constricting my heart's flow had been removed. His training had prepared him to expect anything. He had been told that a woman in her process could be ecstatic, angry, distraught, frustrated or any other of the hundreds of emotions we carry. His challenge was to stay present with whatever showed up, and to be willing to hold those feelings, and me, regardless. He did that beautifully as I cried, went numb, laughed and cried some more.
Over time I have gained an entirely new understanding of the masculine and how much healing there is when it comes together with the feminine with the intention of healing and wholeness. As our session came to a close we both laughed and cried together. I continue to be in awe of the power of presence, intention and healing touch that we can gift to one another. His sense of presence was certainly a gift to me.
After two years of practice, continued training, and eventually becoming a certified Tantric educator, I now know I had only been partially present in my own life. An invaluable part of me had been closed down in such a way that it was difficult to access the higher levels of joy, bliss, insight, intuition and connection. I now realize I had spent a lifetime in shielded protection from being loved too deeply, being seen too fully, opening too widely and being held too closely.
For months following the workshop I noticed how different my world looked and felt. Food tasted different, the wind on my face felt different, my interactions with people on the street were different, and certainly the quality of my close relationships became deeper, stronger and more profound than anything I had ever experienced.
And now, as I work with clients from around the world, I am able to witness the power of sexual healing for others as well. Tantra practice has opened me to new ways of accessing my heart, my feelings and my very being. Yet along with increased highs came increased lows. My range of emotion continues to grow exponentially and my ability to hold them all is increasing as well. I am learning that it is not without contraction that we find expansion, and the work of sexual healing certainly causes both.
As the inhale and exhale of our breath brings life, so the inhale and exhale of
our hearts brings depth.
I continue the practice, I continue the learning, I continue the expansion and I continue breaking through barriers. Sexual healing, as well as my overall wellness, is a process, not an event, and my process is leading to greater joy and satisfaction than I ever could have imagined.
Kim brings a vast range of expertise to her work, as well as her personal passion for assisting in the birthing of a new way to be in the world. TheYinProject.com & the Divine Feminine Institute
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